Chinese Douchebag Teen Makes Mark on History

Chinese tourists. What can be said about Chinese tourists that hasn't already been said by the multitude of signs in mandarin at every major tourism attraction, urging those who understand the language not to spit or litter. There is a certain indignation felt by the Chinese people for being specifically targeted in this way abroad. As a country with such pride in its own cultural heritage, (proudly exemplified by this blog), it's especially disheartening to see our countrymen being disrespectful of the cultural heritage of other civilizations. Teen douche Ding Jinhao did exactly that, and stirred up a shitstorm on weibo, drawing the ire and despair of billions of Chinese netizens.

I kind of feel sorry for the kid. Imagine a 15-year-old, spoon fed by your rich parents everything you ever needed in China, and suddenly one day your parents got the bright idea that you should expand your horizons. Of course, you jump at any chance to ditch school and take a break from being around all the poor people, so you gladly jump on the jumbo jet with your ipod plugged into your ipad and took a 20 hr flight.

It wasn't until you landed that you realized that you're in the middle of a fucking desert, your have no 4G connection, and the only word you understood from the terrorist looking guy greeting you at the gate is "清凉油？”

Yes, you've read and forgotten about the pyramids and the obelisks. You were mildly impressed with all the sand, and a camel bit you in the butt when you weren't paying attention. All in all, the trip wasn't that terrible, and you made it to the Temple of Luxor. The guide was droning on and on about the hieroglyphs, and you wander off pretending to appreciate the sculptures of dead people with weird feet.

It suddenly dawned on you, you are alone, in a country thousands of miles away from your home, in a 3500-year-old temple and your 4G still doesn't work. You are standing in history, this is closest you've ever been to connecting with the souls of past and humanity. You feel elated, you feel alive, you took out your pocket knife, and immortalized yourself by carving into the sculpture "丁锦昊到此一游"



Now granted, these things have happened before. Apparently the Roman tourists littered the ruins of Pompeii with classic graffiti such as:

II.7 (gladiator barracks); 8767: Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7^th legion, was here.  The women did not know of his presence.  Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.

 I.2.20 (Bar/Brothel of Innulus and Papilio); 3932: Weep, you girls.  My penis has given you up.  Now it penetrates men’s behinds.  Goodbye, wondrous femininity!

 III.5.3 (on the wall in the street); 8898: Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog  

VII.2.18 (vicolo del Panattiere, House of the Vibii, Merchants); 3117: Atimetus got me pregnant

VII.9 (Eumachia Building, via della Abbondanza); 2048: Secundus likes to screw boys.

http://www.pompeiana.org/resources/ancient/graffiti%20from%20pompeii.htm

It is interesting to think that perhaps in another thousand years, when all we have done have been forgotten and relegated to the sands of history. As another Shelly and Kierkegaard gaze upon the ruins of our achievements, ask themselves: "When the hourglass has run out, the hourglass of temporality, when the noise of secular life has grown silent and its restless or ineffectual activism has come to an end, when everything around you is still, as it is in eternity, then eternity asks you and every individual in these millions and millions about only one thing: What has mattered?"

The answer will stare back at them, in no uncertain terms, shout loudly and proudly:
"Ding Jinhao Was Here."